4 o’clock was a time for tea. It would go something like this “Mom, tukunywe chai?” “Ni saa ngapi?” “Saa kumi mom” “Basi, tumana maziwa, tupike chai.” Off someone would go, buy milk if there was none. Or just make tea. It’s tea time now. Wish mom was here to have tea. She so loved…
Tag: Grief
Seven months ago
So it’s been 7 months since we lost mom. It’s been particularly hard being here at home and not seeing mom, hearing her voice and laughter, sitting and chatting. Mom had the most hilarious stories that she’d tell over and over and just crack the hell up😅. I feel her absence acutely and miss her…
Give thanks
Okay full disclaimer. For Thanksgiving, this post may be a bit of a downer but read it anyway. I am not sure where I came across this quote but I know I posted it a lot before mom died six months ago today. In looking back, the universe was trying to tell me something but…
Monday
Today has been a hard day but I’m still here. I miss my mom, there’s no way around that. I miss you mom. #grief #missyoumom
No longer myself
The line dividing before and after is stark, bold and clear. Before, there was a me. And now, I am no longer me. #missyoumom, #grief, #mom
The roller coaster of Grief
That’s the only way I can describe grief today. My mom passed way in May. It’s been about 3 months ago. Most days have been really bad days cycling through the so called stages of grief and dealing with regrets and the what ifs, could haves, should haves that are a big part of the…
Guilt and Grief
I had planned to go see mom 3 weeks before she died. I didn’t. I was exhausted. We were working 12 hour days, I was not sleeping well. I was still grieving the death of a good friend. I was still gripped by the silent grief of a childless mother. My guilt is endless. My…
Calls to my mom
Many workdays, I’d get off work tired and just fall asleep then wake up around 11pm. Due to the time difference, it would be 7am the following morning in Nairobi. First of all, I’d wake up to find several missed calls from mom so I would return her call. I would ask what she was…
My mother’s prayers.
Yesterday marked 2 months since mom passed away from this world. I’ve been thinking a lot about her, all day most days really. But a few days ago, I started thinking about mom’s prayers, how she would wake up in the early mornings to pray for those she loved, for the sick, the elderly, the…
Terrible, thanks for asking.
There’s a podcast I found a few months ago with this very name. It’s about those days or times when you feel terrible after loss, grief etc etc and someone asks you how are you? And really you feel terrible but say fine anyway. This is where I am. Where I have been for the…
Authensible Musings: Piercing the mundane of everyday life 