It’s 5:34am, there’s been no sleep. I feel a little better than I did 2 hours, 4 hours ago when I was trying so hard to sleep I’d put sleep meditations on But finally, I just turned told myself to watch TV and relax So that’s what I’m doing. Watching a documentary called Unrest And…
Category: Letting go
One positive side effect of social media.
I think this is the first day all summer that I’ve not had some kind of travel memory on my FB feed or photo drives. All summer, my feed has had almost daily memories of me planning trips, booking flights, packing stuff, shopping, jetlag! Memories of hectic days getting ready to travel, hectic days at…
9/1. 1:37am
I looked up at the clock and it contained 3 of my favorite digits and numbers which is always a delight. And hoped that this would be enough to salvage the night, the new day, the new month. The first of the month is always a good time to reset and start over and my…
The thinnest veil
I read somewhere- I don’t remember where now- that the loved ones gone before us are separated from us by the thinnest of veils. It might have been thinnest paper. I don’t remember. The other morning though. Just before dawn. I was lying in bed, my mind not fully awake. In that semi lucid, semi…
Resilient humans
How amazing that your, ourheartsCan be brokenSo many timesAnd yet weEndure As though resilienceWas written intoOur very own DNABy our Creator Fearfully and wonderfully madeYou, I, WeAll of us Fearfully and wonderfully made.
The watching of the clock
8 or 9 pm: Going to bed early today didn’t sleep well last night. Have some.wine 10pm: Have showered. Took my meds. Sleep will come shortly 12am: close my eyes, relax. It’ll be okay. 12:30am: Hmm stronger drink maybe? Double meds,? 1am: WTF, 1 am and I’m still up but it’s okay. Read a bit,…
Three years ago today
Three years agoWe laid you to restIt was a hard dayperhaps the toughest day of my life ShockDisbeliefFearHeartbreakWatching the coffinYour coffinBe sunk6 feet under Back then, I couldn’t even sayMom diedI said mom passed away Even today, it blows my mind when I think of the finality of dyingThe finality of your deathTo not see…
Little Did I know
Three years ago, my mother was living her last days but I didn’t know that. I had no clue. And her sudden death was and has been traumatizing.. I certainly thought I did. But little did I know that the last time I saw my mom had been the last. That..that hug at dawn on…
I wake up smiling when I sleep well
For some reason, well to be truthful–many reasons, that have changed with the seasons of my life, I have struggled with sleep for many years. So, on many days, No, I have not woken up smiling. I have woken up grouchy, tired, pessimistic and oh so tired. During the day, I would begin to feel…
One day, we won’t be here
This thought occurred to me today. Well it occurs to me a lot lately. I think deep loss does that. Makes us think of the fragility of life and our own mortality. How quickly everything can change. In an instant really. Anyway, the thought came to me during my restroom break. Sitted on the commode,…
Authensible Musings: Piercing the mundane of everyday life 